Decided to put this in hibernation mode for a moment. I am not giving up on my blog- 300ringgit was paid to renew the server&domain last week. But I love myself so much that I can’t afford to let myself struggle in front of my G4, spending hours to think what to share. No point writing just to fill up the 10G space provided by Netonboard. So… let me have some unrecorded moment in my life.

Still, I felt guilty, so I spent some time and created this…

“It should be this, this, this and this if you have a blog. And if it doesn’t, then what’s the point?”- Then… the point is to have something pointless on hand.

I’ll be back!

If forever is not lasting,

then temporary will be eternal.

Else… (god knows else)

Sorry for being materialistic here. But I guess I have to be, because you’re not God so I can’t ask for non materialistic gift (eg: change the sky into Green, move the mountain, make me fly, make my dog speak in my language, cure my short sighted, an angel boyfriend, meet a dinosaur,  live in Far Far Away Island happily ever after…). Well, these fall under my wish list because they’re not reachable by me for now. Would be great if you can try to help out. I am here to keep your job.

Here you go…
PLANE TICKET TO EUROPE
LUMIX GF1
MUSTANG
IPHONE 3GS
HAAGENDAZS CAKE
HP LAPTOP
BURBERRY WATCH
WORKING VISA (EUROPE)
SHUUEMURA SKINCARE

Many many many thanks.

2009 is vanishing. The most sufficient year in my life so far. Out of the ordinary years, I was blessed with great surprises every month. A restless year. An extremely odd year. Tired getting everything out of order. This year, people keep telling me, “You’re still young”. But… but… it’s already quarter of my life- I am not young anymore. Why am I still young? Is it because I took it too serious? Because I over valued them? Too considerate? Nah, maybe the trouble I’m facing is just an illusion that is why people can’t see them. Maybe, those lessons don’t mean anything at all because there are more hardcorer life lessons coming up. What’s next after all lessons?

I always have the same wish in every year-end. Wishing to be somewhere else in next year-end. But this year-end, I’m here again. So next year-end, I wish I would be in… anywhere, just not here.

有些事是永远都解决不完的，每个人都因该学习放弃适当的事物，换回一个解脱(这些话到处都听过,可是就是没勇气做出来)。长远来说，放弃后对自己只有好处。人总会被“放不下”，“舍不得”的心情捆住，但是 执拗在执拗。。。到最后还是毫无意义。觉得自己常常很顽固，一样东西想千万便，得不到方法，还仍然在思考。近来醒觉后才发现原来自己浪费了很多时间。很多时后本来可以轻松过日子，但是偏偏要让自己苦恼做人。。。

”学习多爱惜自己，无益的事别想那么多，无益的事别做那么多，无益的食物别吃那么多。“这是妈妈常用耐心说出的。在深思考，这是智慧的话。”学习“多”爱惜“自己，并不代表学习自私。

我的华语还看得明吧？

Can’t help, for being tired and unable to express anything here. “Think Aster… think… you can’t abandon your Blog”. Been sitting here thinking what to say for almost an hour. Looking back on my previous Blog, wondering how I did that- talking so much nonsense.

This was planed, to move on, so this Nov I’m back to a lone ranger life. The result was expected. I am unsurprisingly enjoying being alone. Not needed to talk for the sake of talking. Keeping quiet, non-stop thinking. So… I guess this is a stage where others will compliment you being “mature”. I doubt if this is a good thing to happen in life. As teachers in schools always reward the obedient, quiet, matured student. But… what if every student tends to be discipline, obedient and mature?

All right, at least I dropped something here. It’s my favorite Bedtime again. Umm… I wanna dream about… something not related to anything I know.

Happened to be around my childhood place last night. Been years without entering that area. Felt curious to know how it had change, so I drove in. Driving down the hill, where my elder brother and I used to walk back and forth to school every day. Looking at the place I used to stay… life was so simple (simplest in my life) during those days. Memories keep flashing back; feeling weird feelings. Shadows seem to be so strange and real at the same time. Not really used to the view I’m viewing the place because was much shorter during that time. Things seem to be so huge when you were young.

Past tense:
…Discovering the mini forest in the back yard.
…Playing Ice&Fire in the playground, together with the other kids (one of them was my childhood crush).
…Hit by a football right into my tummy while walking in the playground.
…Getting lost to tuition class when my brother is not with me.
…Throwing sands on the neighbor’s sausage dogs (they are having 10 of them) and being expelled.
…Playing “harvesting” on the small piece of land in the car park.
…Feeding the wild cats behind my mother’s back- that causes the cats make themselves a home in the huge flowerpot, and then my mom will put them into a box and send them to far far away.
…Humbug my cousin sister to consume gold fish’s food.
…Breaking into my own house.

Life become more and more complicated when we gain more and more past…

Anyone can easily love or like something
But it take dedication to be long lasting
Influences come and go from many direction
But your dedication to that something is what keeps you away from falling

今日反到来，大老同个女朋友仔悌甘D youtube 超傻片。
这是我今天唯一真正笑的时刻。。。
(超傻片1，超傻片2)
不喽都觉得D甘个傻野好废，好塞时间。
但是，某日当你忘记笑，梯下无害。
你会发现笑的乐趣。
我小老，之综仪傻笑戏。
周星绮其中个fans。
—–
自己是个广东人，但是D国文好雌晤是几惦。。。
一定好多错字。。。 是时候检讨下。
天日一定要请教下 Ms. Leong 。
虽然写得好辛苦，悌反D迄喱咔啦文，总还有满足感。
走得太远时，回头望下自己的来源，会懂得点样改进。
就写到呢到，在写下去只会更加不雅。。。丢我爹的面。。。

_____________________________________________________
今日返到来，大佬同个女朋友仔睇緊D youtube 傻仔片。

呢個係我今日唯一真正笑既时刻。。。

(傻仔片1，傻仔片2)

不惱都觉得D甘既傻野好废，好簁时间。

但係，某日当你忘记笑，睇下冇彷。

你会发现笑的乐趣。

—–

自己係个广东人，但係D廣東話好似晤係幾掂。。。

一定好多错字。。。 係时候检讨下。

聽日一定要请教下 Ms. Leong 。

虽然写得好辛苦，睇畨都仲係有满足感。哈哈。

走得太远时，回头望下自己的起點，会識得点样去改进。

就写到呢到，再写落去只会更加不堪。。。丢晒我爹的面。。。

*edited by Ms Leong

Came across a phrase this morning:


Carpe diem quam minimum credula postero

[Seize the day, trusting as little as possible in the future]